“So... You're Going to Be a Grandma”: A Moment I’ll Never Forget

My sister and I walked up the stairs to my mother’s apartment. My heart was pounding in my ears, and I honestly thought I might pass out.

My mom thought I was just bringing my boyfriend over to meet her for the first time—something I’d been trying to make happen for a while, totally unrelated to the pregnancy. (In hindsight, I bet she wished that’s all this was, lol.)

We walked into the kitchen, and suddenly I couldn’t find the words. She looked at me, clearly confused, while my sister stood behind me grinning from ear to ear.

“So… you’re going to be a grandma, because I’m pregnant.”

The words finally escaped my mouth. I stared down at the floor, unable to meet her eyes. I felt like a kid waiting to be lectured. I braced myself for disappointment, for some kind of reaction—anything.

She just looked at me and said, “Are we happy?”

“The jury’s still out on that… but that’s it?” I replied, almost stunned she wasn’t launching into a full-on speech.

“Well, congrats! You did say you wanted a child by 30!”

(Funny enough, I had quietly changed that plan to 33 so I could focus on my career... jokes on me, I guess.)

I blinked in disbelief. No yelling. No shame. No dramatic speech. I had built up this entire horror movie in my head, and for what?

Then she reminded me—I’m a grown woman. I have my own place (well, I was holding down my grandmother’s apartment while she was staying with my uncle in Washington). I earned my BA. I’ve got a solid job with benefits. Why would she be mad?

She did take a moment to mention that she wasn’t exactly in a rush to become a grandmother. I laughed and reminded her that her oldest was about to turn 30… not sure how much more “waiting” she thought she had left!

But she was right—I wasn’t 14 anymore, helping raise my siblings. I wasn’t 17, struggling just to make it across that high school graduation stage. I was a whole adult. And this wasn’t the end—it was the beginning.

It’s funny how, even as adults not living under our parents’ roof, we still carry some fear of disappointing them. I’ll be real: I was sad that the version of the dream I’d imagined had died. But maybe this new dream wouldn’t be so bad.

I had honestly started to think I might never have children—between struggling to find the right partner, dating being an absolute mess (it’s ghetto out there, y’all!!!!), and slowly making peace with the idea of being alone with my dog. “Rich Auntie” was the path my mind was starting to accept.

But as the days passed, I found myself coming more and more to terms with being pregnant. I wasn’t completely sure of the start of this journey but felt like the right time. 

Then it hit me… I still had to tell my grandmother and she has more traditional views.

Man. This really going to mess up my standing as the favorite grandchild lol

Mom and me attending an event (mom on right)